Now Jesus had healed my broken heart and fixed me up just fine. Or, rather, He healed my broken heart and is fixing me up just fine. It’s an ongoing thing. We still meet every day. And of course we walk together every moment of every day. And every now and then He does another little tweak inside me.
But this is all internal, right? It is healing happening inside me. What meeting with Jesus and receiving His love didn’t do was …
- Get me the baby I wanted.
- Get me a better job or the respect of my old job back.
- Make my husband want a baby with me or consider adoption.
- Make my husband desire me more sexually.
- Get me a car with a great stereo and a home by the sea.
So I am still the loser I was. Except everything is different! I am not a desperate loser who looks at the next 40 years with dread because there is no point to living! I am a happy loser with a song in my heart who shares every moment with the One who knows me fully, loves me completely, and every moment is transforming me into the image of Himself, or I would say, into the very substance of Himself, which is love. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE! This is what you discover in God’s grace poured out on you.
God is Love. He loves YOU. He’s not mad at you! He’s not punishing you! He never dreams of punishing you. He was and is willing to give up everything just to be with you. Oh my goodness! If you really experience this, directly from Christ Himself, you cannot stay a sad and broken-hearted loser.
I know it sounds stupid. If what you want is a cool car, a great house, a good-looking mate … and what I offer you is the intimate knowledge of God’s love … well, you can’t eat it or show it off or sell it for something better. I mean, it’s nice, but what good is it, right?
That’s exactly why this is so difficult to explain to someone who is not experiencing it. It sounds like it’s all ethereal and spiritual and nothing you can touch and hold in the here and now. But it isn’t! This love, this experience of God’s love, it turns out, is more REAL, more SOLID, more ENDURING than any mere car, house, lover or bankbook. In fact, it freaking liberates you from longing for the car, the house, the lover, the bankbook. It sets you free to live like a king no matter what your circumstances. This is why the Apostle Paul could say that he knew how to live in plenty or in want (Philippians 4:12) … because when you are experiencing the intimate love of Christ, you have, already, everything you need.
Back to the question: What good is this intimate experience of the love of Christ if it doesn’t get you what you want? Here’s the thing: it does get you what you want. Because the more you experience Him, the more you realize, Jesus is what you want. He becomes your passion. And He is willing to give Himself abundantly to you. You don’t get all the cool stuff you want right now— you get something so much better, it’s not hardly even possible to explain the distance between them.
C S Lewis said it this way, “It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
Far too easily pleased! Yes! If you would choose a cool car, a hot spouse and a great house over infinite joy, then you really are a loser. Just kidding. But I don’t want you to think that apprehending the joy of intimate relationship with Jesus is necessarily going to get you a lot of material blessings. It will get you something so much better and beyond material blessings, your whole perspective will be transformed, and your life will feel like it’s beginning again.